Assertive Communication is One of the Keys to Parenting Issues After Divorce in NJ
Co-parenting After Divorce Comes Along With a Series of Queries That Need to be Addressed, Always Seeking the Child’s Best Interest
No part of divorce is easy, but when children are involved, the challenges of separating from a spouse are amplified. While emotional and financial conflicts may occur during a divorce due to various issues with your spouse, those issues should not affect your co-parenting plan. This, however, is easier said than done. If you are navigating divorce and need help walking the line between asset distribution and the unrelated, more important plan to co-parent your children after divorce, contact us at Bronzino Law Firm to learn how our decades of experience successfully devising divorce and custody arrangements can help you, too. Read on to learn more about the unique challenges faced by those who divorce when children are involved, as well as helpful tips for navigating this transition.
Importance of Distinguishing Couple’s Differences from Parenting Issues
It can seem impossible to compartmentalize the many elements of your separation, but when it comes to co-parenting after divorce, it is essential to put personal feelings and vendettas aside for your children’s benefit. Regardless of how well – or not well – you get along with your ex, you will always be co-parents. Doing everything possible to approach parenting issues from a stance of teamwork will make a marked impact on your capacity to serve the best interests of your child, as well as preserve your respect for one another.
Variety of Factors Affecting Parenting Styles
Parenting style can be affected by multiple factors, which may or may not be compatible with your ex’s. Gender, age, nationality and customs, personality and desires, personal and familial history, health, and the influence of others, including parents, all affect one’s parenting style.
Open Communication to Address Different Parenting Issues
Children need stability. This means that when shared custody agreements are in place, the child must benefit from routines that remain the same regardless of which parent they are with. Helping a child feel grounded across time and different spaces leads to their development of trust in the evolving structure of the family unit and their changing life. Socioemotional health in particular depends on daily routines, as these rituals help them maintain a sense of control in their environment and prevent overactive stress hormones from negatively impacting them on emotional and, ultimately, physical levels.
Routines and rituals must have structure in addition to consistency in order to help a child feel at home. Communication between co-parents is essential for the development and implementation of structured daily routines. It is the parents’ responsibility to help remind their child of routines until they become habits, not the children’s. When co-parents communicate about how to maintain consistency across homes and visitations, the resulting structures show the child that they’re still part of a family that loves them, even as its form has shifted.
When it comes to older children, one of the things that often causes conflict between co-parents is conflicting rules. A lenient parent becomes the “cool” parent, while the stricter one is resented. Incoherence in parenting strategies can sow dis-ease and ill will between parents and leave the child feeling ungrounded. There must be baseline rules and regulations the child is expected to respect regardless of who they are with. While putting your foot down can feel difficult in an already tense time of transition, it will pay off in the long run, as the child will feel emotionally safe and cared for.
In the same way that curfews are essential, systems of discipline benefit greatly from communication and teamwork between co-parents. While systems may feel rigid at first, when adhered to similarly on both parental sides, they create a safe container within which the child feels they will be treated fairly.
Ultimately, when it comes to co-parenting successfully, clear and respectful communication with a shared purpose will take you far. If the conflict remains between you and your ex, limit communication to items that cultivate a stable and flowing life experience for your child. Whether or not you get along personally, you are on the same team when it comes to doing what is best for your children.
Disagreement in Parenting Styles, Child Custody Issues, and Court Decisions
Sometimes, differing parenting styles can lead to divorce, or if already divorced, lead one parent to apply for full custody. The Superior Court: Family Part holds the child’s best interest as its central focus, and it deems equal time with each parent as the ideal. Therefore, unless one parent’s parenting style is abusive or negatively impacts the child’s well-being, some joint custody or visitation arrangement will likely proceed.
Get Representation from Our Experienced Custody Lawyers in Freehold, NJ
If you believe your co-parent’s parenting style is harmful to your child, contact a member of our team at Bronzino Law Firm today. We can help with mediation to get you and your co-parent on the same page in regards to parenting or help you file for full custody if their presence in your child’s life is dangerous in Neptune, Middletown, Red Bank, Tinton Falls, Sea Bright, Bay Head, Lakewood, and across Monmouth County and Ocean County. Contact us today at (732) 812-3102 to schedule a free confidential consultation and learn more about how we can assist with handling the legal aspects of your case in order to support a stable parental experience for your child.