Self-care During and After Divorce – Moving Forward in a Healthy Way
Practice Self-care after Divorce advised by our Brick and Sea Girt Family Lawyers
The process of divorce takes an enormous toll on one’s life and health. Here are some ideas on how to nourish yourself physically, emotionally, mentally, and relationally after divorce.
If you are going through a divorce or have recently gone through one, you may feel like a steamroller has run over you, and regaining your footing, headed towards a sovereign and happy future, may seem far from your grasp. To secure a stable foundation for your multifaceted being as you move into a new chapter in your life, it is essential that you practice self-care during the divorce proceedings and immediately after. What that looks like can take many forms and affect many different areas of your life.
It has been said that the body keeps the score. This means that what is going on in your mental and emotional world often makes an appearance on the ground through your physical body. Stress and discontent manifest as disease, just as calm and inspiration manifest as physical vitality. We offer our bodies during this stressful time to impact our mental and emotional state, thereby creating an allyship between our bodies and our minds.
During this time, you must listen to your body. According to the life science of Ayurveda, the body always strives for balance, while the mind always strives to exacerbate imbalance. This means that when you listen to your body, following its urges, you’ll likely move towards a state of inner harmony. During and after a divorce, committing to a healthy and consistent diet is key. Eat plenty of organic fruits and vegetables, clean the physical (and, by proxy, mental-emotional system), and prepare plenty of root vegetables to help ground you during this anxiety-producing time of uncertainty. Make sure to stay hydrated: The American Heart Association notes that if you are feeling thirsty, it means that you are already dehydrated. When you are dehydrated, you have a higher concentration of toxins in your body than is proper for a healthy balance.
In addition to maintaining a healthy diet, getting regular exercise is important. Exercise causes the brain to produce endorphins like serotonin that improve your emotional state, giving you an overall sense of wellbeing. Whether you engage in strenuous activity such as jogging or weight training, or mind-calming movements such as yoga or martial arts, you will feel the benefits on physical, mental, and emotional levels.
The emotional experience one undergoes during and after divorce often feels like being in the middle of a storm at sea, with waves crashing into your ship and threatening to capsize you completely. To navigate these choppy waters, however, you must allow yourself to feel your feelings fully. This doesn’t mean getting lost in the story of why you feel the way you do. On the contrary, it means sitting with the way the energy is moving through your body – and where-in this very moment. Learning how to identify your feelings and how they manifest in your body will help you master the practice of keeping your head above them and allowing the wave to subside of its own accord while you hold space. Sitting with your feelings is an act of great courage (and perhaps many tears). Still, it is a gold mine of information about where you are stuck and how leaning into the feelings may help old patterning release into emotional freedom.
One helpful ally in this intense process is nature. Connecting with the natural world around you helps develop presence, perspective, inspiration, and humility.
Now is the time to set time aside for yourself – focusing on what makes you feel inspired and creative. Get your creative juices flowing by envisioning a craft or project that you’ve wanted to devote time to but haven’t had the resources for. Even if you don’t yet have the time, money, or energy to dive full in, you’ll benefit from directing your mental intention to something that fills your love tank and has you looking toward the future.
Additionally, meditation is a tool that helps clear your mind and rebalance your nervous system, which may have gotten frazzled – locked in a fight-or-flight stress response – during the divorce. Try mindfulness or vipassana meditation to come home to yourself and find peace of mind.
Divorce can make you feel like you’re all alone. In reality, there are vast networks all around you into which you can tap. Seek the support of like-minded and like-hearted friends and groups who share similar interests. Start a new hobby to meet new people, and seek the professional support of a therapist.
Divorce Attorney in Brick Help You in your divorce process
At Bronzino Law Firm, our family law attorneys’ team supports our clients across Point Pleasant, Brick, Wall, Sea Girt, Spring Lake, and the greater Ocean and Monmouth County Areas in all matters relating to divorce and custody proceedings.
We focus on the fair and swift resolution of your divorce so that you can focus on your future.